mELofiLez

For the first time ever, I am actually appreciating a Thursday. Usually, Thursdays are my hatest day of the week. For the reason that on this day, I have classes from 9.00 in the morning to 5.30 in the afternoon with only a thirty minute break in between. Well today, things ran a little bit different.

My mathematics teacher is on leave for one week, so meaning…. We dont have to go to class, because they usually leave textbook work, which is 100% doable at home. [I know it's an excuse, but it's a good one]. Though, that’s not the only reason why I skipped the class. I’ve learned so many times, that when you fall, and you know you are failing.. The bravest thing to do, is accept the mistake and recupperate from it. Well, today.. this morning, that is what I exactly did. A month ago, I set myself on a lay-by for two jackets at Roger David. [I'm not going to mention how much]. So basically, the jackets were a ‘fortune’. But ‘not-so pessimistic me’ took up the challenge and entered the plunge. I was so excited about it! But just yesterday I realised I dont really need it. LOL. Took me a while ye? haha. But to cut the long story short, I have come to realisation that it was sort of a waste of money. . . So, I cancelled it. hahaha! sucked in. You guys should have seen my drama. I really thank God for being strong in this sort of moments. It was also turned out to be a blessing, because good ol` RD people gave me a full refund! So, it was sort like saving up.. Through a lay-by. [CHEAP] .. haha! What’s done is done, and it doesnt matter anym0re. What matter now is, I have risen up from bankruptcy and I have been given another chance. Let’s hope I wont squander again this time, and I wont be back to zero in my bank by next week. .. LOL. anywaiz…. I still got a long day ahead today . .  I’m just on my lunch break.

Thanks for dropping by. . .

ciao, melo`.

Right now.. I am so bloated. OMG!

As I woke up, the first thing that ever got into my mind was to study more for my modern history test. So I did, during breakfast and after my devotions. I had a jam donut with the Sumatra coffee [c/o Starbucks of course] at home! I cant believe it’s actually possible to have my favourite breakfast at home, without spending :).. So then, later on I got ready and I caught the bus for school. IT WAS RAINING! pouring hard..!!! The only umbrella available at home is the little miniature one.. It was so embarassing, but I went in for the plunge and I walked around with it! LOL. Anywaiz.. So I got to school, so nervous yet pumped up for the test. To my surprise it wasnt actually up till the second period!!! Arrrghh. So I had to wait three hours for it to actually happen. All along, the teacher went on about the War in Gallipolli. Interesting? Yes.. BOring? OF COURSE!!! This totally wrecked my mood for the test! My thinking caps drowned every hour I had to wait, and my mind just drifted to many things. So then the test came………………. BLANK! It was a source based one, and I had 60 minutes.. I spend 40 minutes analyzing the source, I ran out of time to write.. So it was wrecked!!! destroyed!!! Gone!!! Arrgh!! There goes 10 percent of my total assesment mark! :’(

At the end of the day, I was glad so was over and it’s public holiday tommorrow. *phew!* Right now, I feel so bloated. I didnt plan to go out tonight, but I tagged along anyway. On top of indulging my dad’s fried bangus.. I had these mexican fries thingy at chilli’s. I cant breathe! Thank God, we did some standing around activities by playing pool.. Which sort of eased things out. But I still cant breathe!!..

About going to the gym… I think it was a very wrong decision considering my REAL pririorities right now. Though, I want to keep it in. but I dont.. It’s a case unresolved yet.. BUt hello? If I dont get to go for this week.. That’s one fortnight not going!!! HELLO? MELO?! .. money waster!! .. [i need to save up!!].. lol.

I have so much more to write about, but.. I gotta go now!! And oh, about that post I did for my business studies test.. GOd is good, and I topped the test again.. For the first time in life, I’m actually coming close to consistency. I need to keep it going though!!!!!!!!!!!1

welll.. g0n chek in n0w.. still got a long daii tomorowwwWwww.

laterzz doodz!

`ciao, melo!

Can you believe it.. uhhhmm, hello?! curfew..??  since wen was that word ever applicable in my life.. LOL. but YES! my parents imposed curfew at home *for some reason*. hahha. but they shall be linient about it. it’s weird though. i dont like being forced to sleep!.. the idea isnt very pleasant..

I havent been to the gym in a week and a half now. and It upsets me, because.. I’m paying.. and not getting any results. I’ve been hooked to men’s health magazine lately, trying to get inspiration to go.. but, i just feel really lazy. and my long hair is holding me back, because it takes too much to fix it. so.. I can’t go to the gym before something is on like work, or tafe.. because.. DUH! I wont be able to fix my hair……… hahahahaha!

School is back in like around 48 hours.. ok, over calculation.. but who cares.. it’s still drawing nigh* and i dont like it. Well, I guess I get to put my thinking caps back on.. and I get to be a little bit more pre-occupied.

But…. I’m still thinking… hair cut or not.. cut or not.. cut or not…

NO MONEY for that!!!!!!!!wahahaha.

newaiz.. gonna sleep now. BIG DAY TOMOROW.. NOT!

laterz dudez!

`ciao, melo.

No man or woman is worth your tears.
The only one who is, will never make
you cry.

If you love someone, put their name in
a circle, instead of a heart.
Hearts can break, but circles go on
forever.

Everyone hears what you say. Friends
listen to what you say.
Best friends listen to what you don’t .

If all my friends were to jump off a
bridge, I wouldn’t jump with them. I’d
be at the bottom to catch them.

Don’t frown, because you never know
who’s falling in love with your smile !

It takes a minute to have a crush on
someone, an hour to like someone and a
day to love someone—but it takes a
lifetime to forget someone.

To you…

the one that has been ruling over my mind. Please hang on, and dont say it’s over. everything is so complicated, even i find it hard to apprehend with all this going on. if i cant, let alone you getting into this, and finding out at all along ——> makes no sense.  "please that’s enough."

please don’t put me in a situation or in a dillemma where a resort would be to give up, and admit.

i noe … it wouldnt work, no way in the world! that’s why things are like this. nothing more, nothing less. just that one side of things. though, my prayers will never cease. that someway, or somehow. mr. cupid, will unwind the winding roads, to finally let us meet get together.

but as for now,.. please. let’s keep it this way.

"i am the meer friend, and you are my world".

You’ve probably been getting so many email notifications in one day, about how I’ve updated my blog. Well, the things that pop into my mind .. never stops!

I’m still in shock, or in disbelief that I actually took the plunge of pretending, and almost letting go. I mean, why bother keeping something when it’s not serving it’s purpose ye? might as well, let it go and not make it happen. Well, seriously.. I dont know. I’m supposed to be sleeping now cause I opted to go to the gym early tommorrow morning before work. By the looks of it, I think I’m going to pass for the millionth time. I guess, Whitney Houston’s songs are finally making sense in my life now. Nights, are the biggest test of emotions.

Ok, I’m not going to write anymore. NO MORE. NO MORE writing. I’ll just zip my mouth.. that’s it. DONE. DOONE. DONE!!!!

Having time away from each other, gives good time to look back on how we can correct mistakes. How we can make up for the things that has made things rough. Lately, I’ve been going through so much, you guys wouldnt understand. You probably see through my blogs, that I’ve been really messed up.

Though I thank God, for what he has given me. The breakdowns, tears that I know only have started. I realised, something’s gotta give all the time. In two people, one has to be sad in order for the other to be happy. Well not always, but at times. I’ve realised that seeing I’m starting again, I’m going to let go of my own thoughts, feelings, problems, and pains. If that’s what it takes to make things seem normal, and for things to survive longer, I am willing to sacrifice. Though it may be so hard taking everything in to myself, and knowing I cannot run to the only life-line I’ve known for years now.. I will strive, I will learn, I will sacrifice. If this is what it takes. Then, I am willing.

Da da da da da da
da da da da da da da ra dooo
[Priest]
Weeping may endure for a night,
but joy comes in the morning
Trust him.

Somehow I know that
There’s a place up above
With no more hurt and struggling
Free of all atrocities and suffering
Because I feel the unconditional love
From one who cares enough for me
To erase all my burdens
And let me be free to

[chorus]
Fly like a bird
Take to the sky
I need you now Lord
Carry me high
Don’t let the world break me tonight
I need the strength of you by my side
Sometimes this life can be so cold
I pray you’ll come and carry me home

Can we recover
Will the world ever be
A place of peace and harmony
With no war and with no brutality
If we loved each other
We would find victory
But in this harsh reality
Sometimes I’m so despondent
That I feel the need to

[chorus]
Fly like a bird
Take to the sky
I need You now Lord
Carry me high
Don’t let the world break me tonight
I need the strength of You by my side
Sometimes this life can be so cold
I pray You’ll come and carry me home

Da da da da da da
da da da da da da da ra dooo

[Priest]
He says he will never forsake you
Or leave you alone
Trust him

I need You right here right now Lord
I need You right here by my side
Keep your head to the sky
With God’s love you’ll survive

Fly like a bird
Take to the sky
I need you now Lord
Carry me high
Don’t let the world break me tonight
I need the strength of You by my side

Sometimes this life can be so cold
I pray You’ll come and carry me home
Carry me higher, higher, higher
Carry me higher, higher, higher
Carry me home
Higher Jesus
Carry me higher Lord

Each night, and every new day is becoming harder as it comes. I thought it would be better now, but it was worser than you were out of reach. At least, then I had a reason why. Now, even the honesty that I get.. honesty that I’ve been asking for so long is too hard to take. It seems like I was asking for the wrong thing. The question is, now that things are clear and everything is getting clearer than ever, would I be able to handle it? Will I move on, and keep on going in life. Right now, the answer is no. I can’t friggin do anything with life. I can’t finish an assignment. I’ve already flunked my Maths Assessment because of this foolish nonsense. What’s next? The rest of my life.

For the first time in my life, I’ve been waking up to dead mornings. I wake up, with the sound of all the sad songs that describe what’s going on. And the very sad thing is it even follows me in my dreams. I still cry in my dreams for goodness sake! It’s a bit too much ye? And the sad thing is, I know that I have to move on with life, because I have to pursue the plans ahead, but I cant! I cant! I cant!

My prayer is.. that by the end of this day, I get to a resolution on this whole matter. I cant revolve my life around this stupidity.

Ok.. sentimental na naman ako tonight. I dont want to explain, but I just want to thank that person, hope you get to read this. "We pray for our sorrows to end and hope that our hearts will blend now I will step forward and realize that starting a new journey may not be hard, or maybe it has even begun. There are a lot of world but they all share one sky, one day, one… Light. " "It’s was closer than I thought". Nothings ever changed…. nothing will… I feel so low writing this, but it just defines how I really feel right now. The end. . .. *bow*